C-rona chronicles: day 46-51

Around 10:30 one day – Finally lost any sense of what day I'm living in.

Around 10:31 today – Pitch done. Creatives will understand. #BrainDead #FML #SarcasticYay

10:45 today – May the 4th Be With You.

12:31 one day – I've baked every recipe found on Pinterest. My body composition is now 12% Banana Bread, 21% Chocolate Chip Cookies, 36% Sourdough Bread, 51% Pancakes, 24% Cheesecake, 60% Carrot Cake.

12:32 that same day – I know the math doesn't add up. I'm a creative troglodyte not a rocket scientist, ok? Either way, I'm now more dough than man.

1:33 every day – I've tried every get rich quick scheme found on TikTok. I've started my dropshipping business of fart purifiers. Invested my all life savings in Tesla stock. Lost all my life savings because of Elon's comments about Tesla stock. Joined every paid surveys page. Followed every YouTube channel. Created my Etsy store for handmade middle finger pictures. Started a virtual striptease streaming service and saved my Stimulus Check for a rainy day.

3:33 somedays – Call of Duty Warzone is not the game we deserve, but the game we needed right now.

3:34 most of the days – But... I hate 15 year olds that snipe me every time I drop.

5:40 everyday – Beer has become my confidant. I'm really into sour beers these days.

6:30 last Thursday – I almost forgot it was my birthday. Had a fancy dinner at The Table. Went for a round of cocktails at the Couch and ended up passing out at the Other Side of the Couch. Good times.

7:30 – In case I forget, here's the password to open my drawer at work: 1'mN0tTh4t5tuP1D.