C-rona chronicles: day 26

11:00 – I managed to assemble Ikea furniture without the need of a manual. I've finally become a true handyman. Hire me on TaskRabbit if you need my services.

12:30 – Wearing a white t-shirt for my handyman tasks was the right choice. My fragile masculinity feels is raving. It also helps that I'm holding a power tool in my hand.

12:31 – My pride of wearing a white t-shirt is inversely proportional to my chances of spilling tomato sauce on it. Can you guess what just happened?

1:30 – Wore my fancy mask to the store for the first time. The clerk looked really scared of me. I can't tell if it was my month-long bum beard, my COVID-like cough, or the power tool that I brought to keep reinforcing my fragile masculinity.

3:30 – Finally managed to spring clean my apartment. I'm so glad I found another corner to hide the shit I won't use for another year.

4:30 – I'm selling a floor lamp. It's 56% COVID-free. And I'll even throw a free smart lightbulb if you bring your own disinfectant.

7:00 – Nothing to report other than I'm cold and bored.

9:30 – Really digging these Jessie Reyez songs. I'm one or two heartbreaks away of trying to learn her lyrics.

10:30 – There's nothing better than a Spiked Mexican Hot Chocolate to end an eventful day.

Spiked Mexican Hot Chocolate

• 1 Mexican hot chocolate bar

• 4 cups of milk or fake milk

• Rum or tequila to taste

• Bring milk to a boil

• Mix in the chocolate bar

• Serve in a cup

• Drink rum or tequila straight from the bottle, chase it with a sip of hot chocolate