C-rona chronicles: day 29

10:00 – I'm one rainy day away from making macramé blankets. They'll become a heirloom for my non-existent children.

11:04 – Didn't know there was a new Pixar movie on Disney+.

11:05 – Didn't know I was paying for Disney+. #FinancialGenius

11:06 – Started watching the new Pixar movie, Onward. SPOILER ALERT: Magic has feelings.

1:30 – I'm gonna blame today's weather for my lack of clean clothes. I had all the intention to do the laundry today, but this quarantine has made me allergic to the rain, and moving, and being away from my couch for more than 5 minutes.

1:31 – I'm also blaming the weather for my empty fridge and for having to order a family-sized pepperoni pizza with 2 orders of garlic knots, a Mexican Coke, churros, chocolate chip cookies and steamed broccoli.

3:30 – The only good thing about having back-to-back meetings all day is that you don't have to pretend you took a shower. People are already used to seeing you in sweatpants and a beard full of breadcrumbs.

3:31 – Speaking of breadcrumbs, I think beard breadcrumbs should become a fashion trend this year. Most men I know are already wearing them.

4:31 – Tried doing the Instagram challenge where you do a handstand and try to put on a t-shirt. It was an easy challenge. I was twerking the whole time.

4:32 – In other news, I might or might not have a concussion from the previous challenge.

4:47 – I won $20 in the Lotto today. I've never had such a big amount of money in my wallet.

4:48 – To the Nigerian prince that emailed me yesterday and promised me a million dollars. I'm using these $20 I just won to invest in our company. Our luck is about to change my friend.

4:49 – Something tells me the Nigerian prince thing was all a scam. All I got in return is a picture of an old cat.

4:50 – It seems like I'll have to sell my macramé blankets after all...