C-rona chronicles: day 30
9:00 – Happy 1st Quarantine Month! I hope all your wishes of being able to go outside come true!
9:45 – If someone had told me that I'd spend a whole month wearing nothing but sweatpants, I'd have invested in every loungewear brand out there. At the very least I'd have one more pair in rotation.
11:30 – Do you know that moment when you stare at a word for so long that you completely forget how it's spelled. And then you keep staring at it and its meaning gets lost in translation. And then you fall into a rabbit hole where you try to make sense of the word, but you can't pronounce it correctly anymore. And then you reach a point inside your psyche that controls every emotion you've ever had. And then you realize how you could have won that argument you had with your ex 17 years ago. And then you finally find the meaning of life, and realize what you need to do to be entirely happy. And then you come back to trying making any sense of the word that put you in this state of mind — only to realize that you've already forgotten all about it and have moved on with your life. And then you turn left and see that you're now married and have two kids who start asking you how to spell the word you just stared at? I've been there too.
1:30 – They say our greatest ideas come while we're in the shower. Today, I found the cure for COVID-19. If only I hadn't failed chemistry in high school or knew a damn about how viruses and the human body work, I could have saved us all. #BetterLuckNextTime
4:40 – I've become a master of cooking Tofu and making it as flavorful as a medium-rare steak. Here's my recipe:
Flavorful as a medium-rare steak Tofu Recipe
1 Pack of Extra Firm Tofu
Salt and Pepper to taste
Drain Tofu. Cover with a paper towel and put it under a heavy object to squeeze all the water
Put the Tofu away and cook a medium-rare steak
Eat the steak thinking it's healthy Tofu
5:04 – I did one of those Instagram "Ask me anything" stories. The first question I got was from my boss asking if I had finished the deck... I didn't reply...
5:30 – I was today years old when I learned that drying t-shirts in very high heat makes them shrink. Thanks Obama for making me look like a badly wrapped meatloaf. #FML
